The Storm Will Turn to Light

Wow. How's your day been?

Mine was one of the toughest days I've had in quite some time. We had the funeral of one of the teens who had been out to youth twice. He was killed by a train last week, and it hit home today. He was 16, and in need of hope. Not even sure what to think at this point. Just feel pretty powerless. I've been listening to one song for the past few days, and I thought it would be appropriate to share here.

how long have I
been in this storm
so overwhelmed by the ocean's shapeless form
water's getting harder to tread
with these waves crashing over my head

if I could just see you
everything will be alright
if I'd see you
the storminess will turn to light

and I will walk on water
and you will catch me if I fall
and I will get lost into your eyes
and everything will be alright
and everything will be alright

I know you didn't
bring me out here to drown
so why am I 10 feet under and upside down
barely surviving has become my purpose
cause I'm so used to living underneath the surface

if I could just see you
everything will be alright
if I see you
the storminess will turn to light

and I will walk on water
and you will catch me if I fall
and I will get lost into your eyes
and everything will be alright

So it's been a pretty tough day around here. There are two brothers and 4 sisters of this kid, and I watched his oldest brother just sit there and watch him in his open casket. Pretty devastating, but hopefully the nightmare is over. The situation isn't exactly stable, but I'm not even sure that that is what is bothering me. It's just the feeling of being entirely powerless to stop something like this.

I mean, I'm supposed to be part of the freakin' church, right? The hope of Jesus and all that. And that's how I feel tonight.

Powerless.

I think it's the fact that people would walk through the shadow of Jesus (or was it Peter?) and be healed. Yet this kid was able to walk into the church, be in our sphere of influence, and nothing...

So that's where both Michelle and I are at tonight. Just feeling pretty sad, not hopeless, but grieving. Such a strange thing, because we only know the family a bit. I guess they've been on my radar for a while, because they're a fringe family. I just have a lot of thoughts that need to get sorted out. Just a sad image in my head though, one of a boy who lacked enough hope so much that he chose to stand in front of a train.

So you can pray for us tonight. It's really not about us, but it affects us. So if you have a moment, prayer would be great tonight. Thanks all. We love you dearly.